she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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