Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Randomize
