I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize
