just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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