he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Randomize
