I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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