Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
