And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
