he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
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