I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
