I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
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