How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize