I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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