I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
My ass is underappreciated
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
