I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
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