i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
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