I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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