You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
