i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
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