its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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