Im at strip club and am horny
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
