i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
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