Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
