Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
