return my video game
i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
