VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
