She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
