ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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