Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
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