I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
