Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
