Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
