we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
