First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Just high enough for therapy.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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