I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
