they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
