Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Such a big mess for such a small penis
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize
