if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Randomize
