were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
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