i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Randomize
