why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Randomize
