Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
