Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
