I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
