We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize
