Don't you send me to vm
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize
