how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
