Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize