I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
