just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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